18. The Descendants by Kaui Hart Hemmings

1.  After reading Kaui Hart Hemmings' The Descendants:  what was the main theme that you took away from it?  Forgiveness, the importance of family, and dealing with loss.  

2.  What was your favorite instance/scene in the novel vs. in the film?  Did your favorite scene change from book to movie?  No, my favorite scene is the same in both the novel and the film.  It is when Matt says goodbye to his wife telling her that she was his pain and joy.  Very touching scene.  

3.  Was a pivotal piece/scene left out of the movie that you wish had been included?  I think The Descendants movie portrayed the book pretty accurate.  The only big difference is Sid telling Julia about the affair instead of Brian.  Sid had a bigger role in the book but the exclusion in the movie is not a big deal.

17. The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didon

1.  Consider the four sentences in italics that begin chapter one.  What did you think when you read them for the first time?  What do you think now?  When I first read those first sentences about how life changes so fast; my first thought was those statements are so true.  Life changes so fast that before you know it you are somewhere you never expected to be. You get so use to going through the motions that you forget how delicate life is until you get a reminder.

 2.  In particular, address "The question of self-pity."  Does Didion pity herself?  In what ways     

does she indulge that impulse, and in what ways does she deny it?  She allows her self to dwell on  the loss of her husband instead of moving on.  She thinks if she doesn't do things like throw out his shoes he still will be around.  She denies this by dealing with husband death by not falling apart.

16. The Language of Flowers by Vanessa Diffenbaugh

1.  The first week after her daughter's birth goes surprisingly well for Victoria.  What makes Victoria feel unable to care for her child after that week ends? And what allows her to ultimately rejoin her family?    The baby needs more than Victoria feels she can give which makes Victoria feel inadequate.  She feels that she has to get away from the baby.  So she leaves the baby crying and she feels terrible.  Victoria never feels capable of being able to give love and receive love.  She realizes that she is capable and her past mistakes don't have to define her future.  

2.  The novel touches on many themes (love, family, forgiveness, second chances).  Which do you think is the most important?  And what did you think was ultimately the book's lesson?  All of the books themes are important.  I believe love is the most important because it is the basis for all the other themes.  Love is key in being in a family, forgiving, and getting second chances.  Love breaks all barriers.  The book's lesson is to believe in yourself and don't let your past define you.  Once realizes she doesn't have to live by what has happened in the past she can move on and learn to love her family.

3.  Based on your reading of the novel, what are your impressions of the foster-care system in America?  What could be improved?  The foster-care system has cracks in it and some kids like Victoria fall through it.  Some people abuse the system only seeing the kids as a paycheck.  The system is flawed mostly for kids who get a certain age and are lost in the system. More effort could be focused on helping these kids be more successful when they become adults.  

4.  Victoria and Elizabeth both struggle with the idea of being part of a family.  What does it mean to you to be part of a family.  What defines family?  Being a part of a family is like having an enormous support system that helps each other through life's ups and downs.  Family doesn't have to be blood-related they just have to love and support each other.

5.  What potential do Elizabeth, Renata, and Grant see in Victoria that she has a hard time seeing in herself? Because of the years she spent feeling unwanted and unloveable she think she doesn't deserve to be loved or to be a part of a family.  Elizabeth, Grant, and Renata try to show Victoria that she is wanted and is accepted into their family.  Victoria thinks she will mess up anyone she tries to love.  But they believe that she is capable of being anything she wants to be.

15. Defending Jacob by William Landay

1.  How would you have handled this situation if you were Andy?  Would you make the same choices he made?  Where would you differ the most?  Clearly, Jacob had some issues.  I understand the he wanted to defend his son but when it became obvious that Jacob committed murder Andy should have told the truth.  In telling the truth he might have been able to get Jacob the help he needed.  I don't have any children but if I did I hope I would always do the right thing. I know some parents would cover up for their children and even help them bury the body so to speak.  I would have turned Jacob over to the police and hope that he could get some kind of insanity plea.  So he could live in mental institution because he had severe mental problems.

2.  Before and during the trial, how would you have handled the situation if you were Laurie? Do you feel she made strong choices as a mother and a wife?  I would have broken completely down.  It would have been hard to know that your child is crazy violent.  You try your best to raise a responsible child and then it all falls apart.

3.  Is Andy a good father? Why or why not?  He loves his son that is clear.  I think deep down he knew his some committed the murder but he was so focused on defending him he refused to see the truth. I think part of being a good parent is always supporting your child but also calling them on it when they do things that are not right.

4.  Do you believe Jacob is guilty?  Hell yeah!!! In the beginning and the middle there are small doubts but at the end its apparent Jacob is guilty.

5.  Is Jacob a product of his upbringing?  Do you think he is a violent person because his environment makes him violent, or do you think he has violent inclinations from birth?  I think people are like a gumbo a variety of factors make they who they will become.  Biological elements are a huge part and we have no control over these.  Skin color, height, inclinations to be violent, kind, shy, talkative.  We have no control over these things.  Then throw these natural proclivities in with our surrounding environment which sometimes we have little control over also you have a recipe for a human being.   I believe you always have a choice in what you will become.  But negative biological and environmental inclinations are often insurmountable obstacles.   Also we must never use our situation as an excuse.  We must always push ourselves to be responsible human beings even if everything in our bodies seems to go against the society we find ourselves in.

14. The Other Wes Moore by Wes Moore

1.  What are the main themes in the story?
Choices...how important they are and how the wrong choice can lead to other wrong choices until you end up in a place you never expected.

2.  Do you think having "positive" role models as a child serves as a deterrent to a life of crime? Is what constitutes a "positive" role model the same for everyone or does it vary?  If everyone around you is doing right you are going to want to do right.  Positive role models give children an example of how they should be in this world where there is always someone trying to influence them.  A role model should lead by example with actions not with words.   Positive role models influence others to lead a life that is productive, crime free, and hopeful.

3. Oprah Winfrey has said that "when you hear this story, it's going to turn the way you think about free will and fate upside down."  So, which is it... freedom or determinism?  If determinism, what kind of determinism-God, cosmic fate, environment, biology, psychology?  Or if freedom, to what degree are we free to choose and create our own destiny?  I think who we become is like a gumbo with several different ingredients.  Throw in biology, environment, and a dash of free will and you make a person.  I believe our biological make up is a start to who we will become.  Things we have no control of like height, skin color, "beauty" according to society standards, disposition. These qualities influence our behavior.  Then mix in environment.  Those around us who serve as an example to who we should be and how we should act. Those who create a haven in a dark situation.  Or those who make a mansion feel like living in hell.  Environmental factors weigh heavily on us.  Making us more likely to act one way or another.  But free will is not totally absolved in the situation.  After all the environmental and biological influences are placed on us we still have to make the choice about how we should act and react to our situations.

13. The Untelling by Tayari Jones

I already made a review for this book answered some discussion questions and somehow it got deleted.  I'm not about to go through that again.  So I'm going right off my head.  The book was good even though it is my least favorite out of the the three books I've read by Ms. Tayari Jones. I think about dealing with life when it goes somewhere unexpected and the importance of family.   Her books are so easy to read they keep you entertained.  You shouldn't hold on to secrets and telling them will help you go forth.  

12. Silver Sparrow by Tayari Jones

Sad sweet. The story of a father's failures. As he tries to be a good parent to one child he mistreats the other. The father is a complete prick. How he treats his daughter Dana is despicable. The sad part of the story is even though it is a work of fiction things like this happen everyday. I like the layers in Tayari's works. The interconnections the thread she weaves. What I learned: a little honesty goes a long way. Make connections in my work. What I've noticed about the two novels I read from her is she uses different point of views. Also, she uses historical references. I want to consider using these methods in my works.